Going for an ultrasound

Yup, unfortunately I'm still blogging about the miscarriage. I saw the doctor on Thursday and although I didn't really need the appointment as I knew my hcg results were 7 and considered negative I kept it and we talked about what the plan would be when I do get pregnant again. I've decided to go back to the maternity group I was with when I was pregnant with Hailey. They have an ultrasound machine right there and will be able to put my worries at rest each appointment. I'll also go see my doctor right away to get my ferritin and tsh checked to decide if I need to go back on synthroid and up the iron I'm already on. I told her I'd finally stopped bleeding that Tuesday (19th) and she told me that's good but to come back and see her if it starts up again. Dan and I had recently decided that with the extra long bleeding and potential for complications we were going to use condoms this month. I was fearful of something going wrong and having an ultrasound only to have them unsure if it's leftovers from the miscarriage or a new pregnancy. I'm glad we did because yesterday I started bleeding again. It started really light at 5:30am and peaked at 9:30am. It was never really that much but I had this dull pain from 8-10 so decided to make a doctors appointment for this afternoon. I had no bleeding today and since my appointment was at 4:50 I went to the washroom just before I left at 4:40 and there was nothing. I told the doctor about the bleeding and how I hadn't had any today. She said the only thing left to do was an ultrasound to make sure and asked if she could do a pelvic exam. I've never been shy with doctors so I dropped my pants and when I did noticed that I had a little bit of blood on the panty liner I'd put on. I showed her and said that I guess I'd started again. She did the exam and yes I definitely started bleeding again. She told me she wanted me to have an ultrasound done this week and that they'd call me to let me know when. It is however a good sign that during the exam I wasn't tender. Hopefully it's just my hormones acting funny and trying to regulate themselves.

I just want this to be over. I hate not knowing what my body's doing. I want my normal cycle back so we can finally start ttcing. Patience is something I've really been working on this past month. I have been much more relaxed though since we decided this would not be our month.