No echo date yet

I'm getting a little frustrated with my doctor's office again. I had my last appointment 2 weeks ago and she asked about setting up the echo and the 18 week ultrasound. I told her that they did an anatomy ultrasound every time I had the echo with Hailey so I just needed that appointment for that and I told her that they told me it would take about 8 weeks to get one. We talked about a date and I asked if she could try to set it up for 20 weeks because I'd rather go longer not knowing if there's a problem and I'd like to let the heart develop as much as possible first. The 8 week wait is partially why I waited until 12 weeks to see my doctor.

I still haven't heard anything so I called the office yesterday and spoke to the receptionist. She said that it was in my file and that I had to be at least 18 weeks (no kidding!) so she'd send a reminder to the doctor. I'll be 15 weeks on Friday. If it takes 8 weeks to get an appointment I'm not looking at getting in until 23 weeks. I can't wait another 8 weeks to find out if this baby is ok and if it is less Dan and I both need to book the day off work. I don't even want to think about how hard that decision will be if something's wrong. What if this baby has HLHS and they don't think they can do surgery too? That gives us less then a week to decide. The guilt of continuing if this baby's sick is just going to kill me. I told Dan when he made the decision with Hailey that if it happened again we'd make the same decision every time. That our second child isn't more important then our first but I don't know if I can go through that again. I'm not even going to think about it. This baby is healthy and I won't ever hear that we have "options".

I have my next appointment on the 10th which is pretty much 2 weeks away. If I still don't have a date or the echo date is later then 20 weeks I'm going to ask for the anatomy scan to be done at 18 or 19 weeks. At least they'll have a good idea if everything's ok and if it's not I  know that they can fit you in because they did within a week when we had Hailey's anatomy and 2 weeks from the first to the second echo. They picked up Hailey's problem last time with the anatomy scan they just couldn't give us a diagnosis.

It makes me sad that we haven't done the planning like others have at this stage. I had a girl who's 20 weeks at work today ask me if we've thought of names. It hasn't even crossed my mind. Nothing about this pregnancy past 20 weeks has crossed my mind. I guess what it comes down to though is that no matter what happens we will need a name for this baby eventually. We'll get to that part of the process when we're ready. Hopefully we still have plenty of time.