Another month

I'll start off with saying I took a pregnancy test yesterday (Tuesday) and it was negative. It's a little early since I'm not due to start until Friday night but the wait was TORTURE! I know technically I could still be pregnant (I took an early response test) but I'm much more relaxed and excepting that it probably won't happen this month.  I told Dan last night that I hated who I'd become. Before we started trying I always said I'd never be one of those people who spent all the time thinking about getting pregnant and I wouldn't chart or anything like that. How naive was I! We weren't in a hurry to get pregnant with Hailey, it was more lets start and if it takes a while that's ok. Now that we've come so close and have held our child it's always on my mind. So taking the test has made it less stressful and now I will just look to next month.  I find it easier to see the negative test then to wait and find out from starting my period. I guess we will take this next week to decide if we are going to try in November or wait.

On a different note it was an eventful day at work! First I got a call from our head office offering me a position for the next month going around and tweaking how things are done to make it more effective. I'm really happy about this because it means I get a month break from patients and I'll be super busy so won't have much time to think about getting pregnant and what this next cycle means to us (hard to believe Hailey was conceived in 2 weeks a year ago. To go a little off topic I was thinking today how I might've lied to the doctor about my LMP so that the due date would be on Dan's birthday instead of the day before because I remember before we found out I'd said that the due date would be a day before and I was a little disappointed but I may have just done the math wrong.) So I'm really excited to do this. It'll mean a lot of travelling around (which I'll get mileage pay for) and full time hours which I'm not used to ( I work between 50-60 hours in a 2 week period.) Extra money just in time for christmas!

I also worked a split shift today. From 9-12 I was at one lab and then from 1-5 I was at another. At 3pm we got a call from my friend at the first lab saying a patient became unresponsive in the waiting room. I guess an elderly man was waiting for his wife who was our patient and just fell over. No warning, nothing. He'd stopped breathing and had no pulse.  I didn't ask her any questions about it but I'm assuming they did CPR until the ambulance arrived. It doesn't look good. He lost all muscle control so he threw up and(I'm trying to think of a tactful way to say this) lost what was in his bowels. This isn't a good sign so unfortunately I don't think he survived. His poor wife just had to watch, thankfully he came with her because at least he had a better chance of surviving then if he was at home. As sad what happened is, I was more worried about my friend who's 34 weeks pregnant and had already gone into early labour at 27 weeks. She seems to be ok, obviously shaken but her and the baby are ok. I only bring up what happened because it has me shaken. This is why I chose private lab over hospital. On my practicum I watched while doctor's worked on a cancer patient who didn't survive and I wanted to hopefully never see that again. Apparently although this isn't common it does happen (the lab I was working in the afternoon had 3 in a year and half.) It also made me think how well do I really know CPR? It's been 4 years since I've had my last training and although I have a pretty good idea, I'd be guessing where to press and how hard. In the end I guess doing CPR wrong is better then not doing it at all. Dan and I had talked while we were trying to decide with Hailey and I wouldn't have let someone who hadn't taken a child CPR course in the past year alone with her. You hope you never have to use it, but sadly you never know, especially with a heart baby.

Tomorrow is Remembrance Day. I'm going to take my grandmother up to grandpa's grave. The terrain isn't very good so she hasn't gone out there very much these past couple years.