Well my cousin who was due on the 14th had her baby on Monday. She had a girl, which we all knew before. While I'm happy for her I'm also a little sad, I'll get into that in a minute.
I can't remember if I mentioned before but my aunt is out visiting from Poland. She works as a teacher at international schools. I like seeing her but sometimes she can be really insensitive. She took my grandma and another aunt to the east coast for a bit of a holiday. My grandma in English and met my grandfather during the war. She's not considered a war bride as they only met on D day and my grandfather signed up to stay after the war was officially over and help rebuild. They also didn't get married in England. He came back to Canada and sent for her 6 months later. She came over on the ship with lots of war brides and because we live on the West coast had a nice LONG train ride across Canada. She's always wanted to go back to Halifax and see Pier 21 (which is where all the war brides landed.) She had a great time and they got back Wednesday to find my cousin had her baby.
We went over to visit and my aunt needed Dan's help with her new laptop. Maybe it's just my hormones but I'm still quite upset with her comment. She asked me if I was jealous of my cousin. OF COURSE I AM. Let me just count the ways for you:
1- She's done being pregnant and having to worry about stillbirth and all that can go wrong in labour.
2- She had a girl
3- She had a healthy baby
4- She got to take that healthy baby home
I'm happy for her. I really am, it's just hard sitting here waiting and worrying. My anxiety has been bad the past few days. 3 years ago I went on anti-anxiety meds because I was getting really light headed and dizzy. My GP couldn't find a reason for it but with my wedding coming up and us buying a house she thought it was worth trying the meds to at least rule it out. They stopped how I was feeling and I only went off of them when I stopped taking birth control. I had a few days of feeling like that when I went off of them but for the most part have felt great since. This past week though is the most anxious I think I've ever felt. All I do is analyze every movement this baby makes and worry. We're so close to having our take home baby and I'm so scared something will go wrong. Needless to say I've now started to get dizzy again. Just to give you an idea of what it feels like, even when I'm laying down it feels like the room's spinning. I'm hoping and I'm pretty sure it'll go away after I have the baby.
Dan and I gave dates/ times and weight of when the baby will be born so I thought I'd share it with you:
Daniel- July 22nd (due date) 7.9lbs (or 3.6kg as he knows it) and at 17:40.
Me - Induced (no date as it all depends on how far over they let me go) 8.5lbs and at 23:05.
Secretly hoping Dan's right!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment