The wedding

My husband's brother is getting married tomorrow and everyone is currently at the rehearsal. I'm feeling a bit sorry for myself. I know it's stupid and I shouldn't feel this way. Up until being in the house by myself I didn't. Here's the thing. All of the siblings as well as the other sister in law are in the wedding. It was only going to be my husband's twin brother as best man, her brother as a groomsman and the twin brother's wife as bridesmaid. Then about a month and a half ago my husbands parents told his brother he should have him in the wedding so he wasn't left out. I guess it just makes me feel like I'm right in thinking that I've never really been part of this family. It really annoyed us that his parents made him be part of the wedding because he didn't want to be (nor do I, it's just that I kind of feel really left out and not important in his family.) We thought that they should be able to have whoever they wanted as part of the wedding and I think now there will be 4 men and 3 women in the wedding party. This is why for my wedding we only have his twin brother and my sister.

I think I'm partly upset because when we first told his parents we were pregnant his mum got mad because it would mean I was going to be pregnant at their wedding. I never really understood this because there's always at least one pregnant person at weddings. Anyway now I'm not so I guess that's better for them!

I'm so frustrated with myself because it's such a silly thing to be depressed about considering I don't actually want to be a part of the wedding. I think I also feel stupid tomorrow sitting there while everyone else is at the alter and while they are off taking pictures.

I'm adding this a little later. My husband just got back from the church and when the priest asked his brother why my husband didn't have a partner he said it was because of what happened with the baby. Honestly that's complete bullshit. I can't even think of any reason how that would make sense especially since they only asked my husband after the birth. It doesn't do anything but make me feel worse because I'm the only one sitting out.
Whatever I'll just do what I do every other day since the hospital. Put on a smile and pretend that everything is ok and I'm happy.